Forgiveness Through Love: The Interplay Between Love and Forgiveness
- Eric J Herrholz

- Jan 13
- 4 min read
I’ve been there. That raw, gnawing ache when someone you trusted shatters your world. The betrayal, the anger, the endless replay of what went wrong. But here’s the kicker: forgiveness doesn’t come easy. It’s messy. It’s gritty. And it’s deeply intertwined with love. Not the fairy-tale kind, but the kind that demands courage, guts, and a willingness to face your own pain head-on.
Let me take you on a journey through the tangled web of forgiveness through love. We’ll dig into why forgiveness is not just a gift to others but a lifeline for yourself. We’ll explore how love fuels this process, how faith can anchor it, and practical ways to start healing today.
Why Forgiveness Through Love Is a Game-Changer
Forgiveness isn’t about forgetting or excusing the hurt. It’s about choosing to release the hold that pain has on you. And love? Love is the engine that powers this choice. When you forgive through love, you’re not just letting go of bitterness—you’re reclaiming your life.
Think about it. Holding onto resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. It eats away at your peace, your joy, your very soul. But when love steps in, it softens the edges of that pain. It doesn’t erase the scars, but it changes how you carry them.
Here’s what I’ve learned:
Forgiveness is a process, not a switch. It takes time, patience, and often, repeated effort.
Love is the bridge. It connects your wounded heart to the possibility of healing.
You don’t have to forget to forgive. Remembering can be part of the healing, as long as it doesn’t chain you to the past.
Imagine standing at the edge of a cliff, ready to jump into the unknown. That leap is forgiveness. Love is the safety net below, catching you when you fall.

How to Cultivate Forgiveness Through Love in Your Life
So, how do you actually do this? How do you turn the abstract idea of forgiveness through love into something real, something you can grasp when the pain feels unbearable?
Here are some gritty, no-nonsense steps that helped me—and might help you too:
Acknowledge the pain. Don’t bury it or pretend it’s not there. Sit with it. Feel it. Name it.
Understand the other person’s humanity. This doesn’t mean excusing their actions. It means recognizing they are flawed, just like you.
Set boundaries. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to stay in a toxic situation. Protect yourself.
Practice empathy. Try to see the situation from their perspective, even if it’s uncomfortable.
Choose to forgive daily. It’s not a one-time event. It’s a commitment you renew every day.
Lean into love. Whether it’s self-love, love for others, or a higher love, let it be your guide.
These steps aren’t easy. They demand honesty and vulnerability. But they’re the foundation for real transformation.
What does God say about love and forgiveness?
Faith has been a cornerstone in my journey toward forgiveness through love. When I felt like giving up, I found strength in spiritual teachings that emphasize mercy, grace, and unconditional love.
The Bible, for example, is clear: forgiveness is not optional. It’s a command and a pathway to freedom. Jesus taught us to forgive seventy times seven times—not because we’re perfect, but because love is relentless.
Here’s what stands out:
Forgiveness reflects God’s love. When we forgive, we mirror the divine mercy extended to us.
It frees the forgiver. Holding grudges distances us from God’s peace.
Love and forgiveness are inseparable. One cannot exist without the other in a spiritual context.
This spiritual perspective doesn’t sugarcoat the pain. It acknowledges it but offers a way through it—a way to transform suffering into strength.

The Role of Self-Love in Forgiveness
Here’s a truth that’s hard to swallow: you can’t truly forgive others if you don’t forgive yourself first. Self-love is the foundation of all forgiveness. Without it, you’re building on shaky ground.
When trauma hits, it’s easy to internalize blame. You replay the “what ifs” and “if onlys” until your self-worth crumbles. But self-love says, I am worthy of healing. I am worthy of peace.
How do you cultivate self-love in the midst of pain?
Speak kindly to yourself. Replace harsh self-criticism with compassion.
Celebrate small victories. Every step forward is progress.
Seek support. Therapy, support groups, or trusted friends can help you see your value.
Practice forgiveness inwardly. Release guilt and shame that weigh you down.
When you love yourself, forgiveness becomes less about the other person and more about reclaiming your own power.
Turning Pain Into Purpose: The Power of Forgiveness Through Love
Here’s the raw, unfiltered truth: forgiveness through love is not just about healing wounds. It’s about transforming your entire life. It’s about taking the broken pieces and building something stronger, something meaningful.
When you forgive, you break free from the chains of your past. You open the door to new possibilities. You find purpose in pain.
How can you harness this power?
Use your story to inspire others. Sharing your journey can light the way for someone else.
Channel your energy into growth. Pursue passions, goals, and dreams that uplift you.
Build deeper connections. Forgiveness opens your heart to authentic relationships.
Embrace spiritual growth. Let your experience deepen your faith and understanding.
Forgiveness through love is a radical act of courage. It’s saying, I refuse to be defined by my trauma. I choose to rise.
If you’re ready to start this journey, remember: it’s okay to stumble. It’s okay to feel lost. What matters is that you keep moving forward. Love and forgiveness are waiting on the other side.
For more insights on how to embrace this path, check out love and forgiveness.
You don’t have to walk this road alone. Reach out, take that first step, and watch how your life begins to change.



